Thanksgiving Menu

• Hickory smoked & grilled turkey
• Oven roasted turkey
• Snookms penis
• Pansit
• Lumpia
• Homemade mashed po-ta-to(e)s
• Turkey & beef gravy
• Dinner rolls
• cranberry jelly sauce
• Green bean casserole
• Homemade pumpkin pie
• Pecan pie
• leftover Mandarin salad that Snookms' sister made last night

Napalm Wishes & Caviar Dreams

I hate to say it but I may be throwing the towel in on NaNo. I am s'very behind, still only @ the 5k mark. I've had at least 3 days off that I spent having nothing to do with writing. I've gone over the last chapter & the flame has just kind of tuckered out. For now. Maybe it'll spark back up, but for now I am just not going to beat myself up over it. The absolute desire to want to tell that story is still there, so I'm happy for that. At least I have some good bones to work with when I do decide to pick it back up. Right now it is kind of a schizophrenic mess & I know exactly where all the threads tie together but I just can't get to the point where it makes sense to anyone else.

I went over to my mom & dad's last night for Dexter/Spartacus-but-it's-no-longer-Spartacus-because-we-watched-the-final-ep-so-now-it-is-United-States-of-Tara-Night. My mom wasn't awake yet so the renegade wizard & I watched a few episodes of Ancient Aliens & it was dumping a bunch of extra fodder in this noggin o' mine for NaNo inspiration. My dad is a real hoot when we watch that show because he gets fed up with the Brendan Frasier lookin expert & says to him "Get a fuckin haircut if you wanna be relevant". Just like that, right at the t.v.! One of the eps was addressing the secret tunnels that were discovered in some Zoroastrian Empire in like, 300 B.C.? Was pretty awesome to see all these ancient underground caverns carved out in the peaks of these petrified lava formations. I am all for supersekrit tunnels, y'know?

Dexter was top fucking notch, as usual. The intensity of that show can almost get to be too much? Like, you have to get up & go take a walk around the house afterward to gather your thoughts kind of intense? That's good though, I like it. In a matter of watching one season I have pretty much fallen for every character in the story, it's just that good. Relentless & Heartless Dexter hardly ever comes out to play, but oh, when he does? ... I am putty in Showtime's thriving little handsssssss.

United States of Tara is somewhat of an oldie, but it's great to watch. I think Buck & 'T' are my favourite alters of any of the personalities so far. I'm sure there are many others that feel this way too. Kudos to Toni Collette for pulling all those off so diligently. Buck is the motherfucking Protectors of Protectors, no? SO MUCH LIKE MY OWN.

This was Sunday, right? & then Saturday evening I went with Mysty & PrettyPrettyDeathPrincessErica to the Rocky Horror Picture Show @ Irving Theater on the East Side. It was all very last minute for me, I was at a bit of a crossroads in decision making there. I am horrible at making choices in a hurry. Also, I was a virgin, so that experience was pretty exciting for me but also nerve-racking. Mysty's such a good, enthusiastic little mommy, though, taking pictures of her girl at her first day & all. That's what she reminded me of anyhow.

(ppdpErica, yours truly & Mysty being creatures of the night)

Thursday was the midnight showing of Harry Potter. I confessed I was dosing off big time for the first hour and a half, but not because I was bored, but because I am olde! I bolted awake with the impression that Mysty & her Werewolf might poke fun at me for my lame old lady-ness so that notion of worry right there was enough to keep me alert for the rest of the show. There were SO MANY fucking people @ the theater. & then team Gryffindor all got bitched at (well, unwarrantingly accused, anyway) of stealing the Gryffindor flag that the Indianapolis Harry Potter Society had made for the event. Kudos to Mysty for speaking out & aloud amongst the masses in our favor. I mean, I hope the flag turns up, but weDIDN'TfuckingDOit!

Oh! I made a second attempt @ homemade potato(e) soup yesterday afternoon, this time using a gravy based recipe. It came out a lot better this time; last time it seems as though the recipe was just really milked down mashed potato(e)s with some celery, onions & diced ham thrown in. This time 'round it was actually creamy & you could taste more of the onion flavor in it. The only thing I didn't like was the ham chunks I used. They were way too chewy to blend in with the whole homemade feel of the soup. So next time I am going to try bacon chunks & see how that pans out. Snookms & his pal really liked it though. I made a ridiculous amount & it is all gone already.

Thanksgiving dinner is going to consist of going to our family's abodes & then Friday will be me & Snookms' day to cook stuff. He'll be doing a turkey (he's talking about cooking it on the grill using a special recipe his co-worker is handing down to him) & I'll be doing pansit & lumpia again, like we did last year. I'm kind of worried that the idea of cooking the turkey on the grill sounds better than it really is, but Snookms is willing to take the risk so we shall see. At least we'll have the filipino cuisine if it doesn't work out.

Okay so something I have to talk about real quick before I go is Spartacus. I am currently in final episode mourning, because there is no more Spartacus to watch. I don't even know if there is going to be another season in production but seriously? SRSLY! That fucking show. Everyone is fucking everyone, both literally & metaphorically. & Lucy Lawless is so good at being cunt. Who was she, Lucretia? Yeah, that character right there. OOOOH GAWD. & Crixus. He was such a stubborn fuck but goddamn he was sexy. I tried to fight against it for the duration of the show, but that last episode had me by the balls. Something in those eyes of his reminds me of Snookms. The longing & passion he played so well, I s'pose. & then of course Spartacus. If Crixus & Spartacus had a bay-bay, Snookms would be their lovechilde. His loyalty to the Thracian way of life + his steadfast loyalty to his wife's cause = Snookms & his lawful good alignment swagger.

KILL EM ALL BABY.

Me & shespawn's newest 'which movie star would play a good character for so & so' meme is Heather from Silent Hill 3. She had shown me some article on the net the other day saying that there was a possibility of ol' what's her face? from Drag Me to Hell & White Oleander had a possibility of being fronted the role, which I thought might work. At first we were Team Holly J all the way but this morning I realized her boobs were too big. & then shespawn said Emma Watson & I was all Huh/waaaaat? but then I was like, "Y'know? I'd like to see that. I wouldn't mind that at all". So that was the basis of our morning conversation today & it was rather entertaining.

& now? I got nothin.

o'HAI!

Been forever, right? I know!!!

Well first off, happy October everybody. Mine has been pretty great to start off. September ended with shespawn's 11th birthday. She got an xbox 360 for her bday, so I was pretty excited about that. Didn't have enough money to snag her any games tho so we just let her pick out Bioshock to rent @ Family Video. That game is WOO-HAW, got you all in check! ... right? Yeah, it's pretty engaging. I mean, I haven't played myself, mostly just stood back in the dark corners & watched proudly as she plugged away through it's recesses. She had to play gaming counselor once Fezziwig & his homiez got in on the action. It was pretty cute.

Last week was just a whole buncha fucking fun, got to see the unedited version of The Exorcist @ Regal (too bad it wasn't at Rave tho, eh?) with Mysty & her Werewolf. I hafto admit I was getting some butterflies in the stomach the week previous to it, because I am a gutless turd when it comes to that movie. But like I told Mysty, going to see it on the big screen helped me to deal with the childhood trauma of it all I guess? It was fun! I never have got to see Spider-like Megan run down the stairs all crazy with blood dripping from her maw. That was damn spooky. & the whole, "Let Jesus fuck you" bit. The version I always saw was just, "Fuck me, FUCK ME!!!" so yeah, blasphemy all around folks!

Theeeeeeeen, Friday was great because I got to take my 3 spawn & let them pick out Halloween paraphenalia @ Halloween City. That place used to be a furniture outlet so it is pretty damn huge for a Halloween store. I totally dig it. Jr. was able to pick out the mask he claims is from the 1978 version of Michael Myers from Halloween. They didn't have Fezziwig's Freddy claw he had had his heart set on getting so we left to get early dinner. I tell you what, traffic on the Westside of Indy is a bad nightmare. Not at all the good kind. I almost wanted to off myself fighting for the right to park in Panera parking lot. The Chicken Cobb salad nearly wasn't worth the battle.

Was s'posed to go clean for my mom & dad that night but I wound up cancelling cuz my bones were a'achin'. It was a super busy week for Kristi Klean. No maid cosplay for me that night!

Instead shespawn & I elected to stay home & found The Exorcism of Emily Rose On Demand to watch. Had my Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate to sip on whilst we enjoyed preying witness to eager spider consumption on Miss Rose's behalf. That movie is still freaky, but not nearly as freaky as The Exorcist.

Saturday was nice to wake up to. A little toss in the hay with Snookms before getting outta bed for the day. Then he made me coffee which always scores him massive brownie points. Grabbed shespawn & we headed up to Walmart to do some ultralord groceries. I always wind up doing massive groceries when I go there. But it was fun because we had the cash to do so. They had the cutest Halloween themed clothing there, shespawn picked out a skele-bride long sleeved tee & a matching beanie. I found a vamp themed one with deep red colours mixed with grey, the sleeves are all did up in black & white stripes too. Found an owl beanie just for me too! So we looked like cheesy twins all night in our new threads.

Got home & made that Velveeta/salsa hamburger nacho dip thing for dinner. I got stupid excited about making it because it's so easy to make & it has been so long since I last made it. Like, years ago long? I almost had Snookms talked into going to the haunted hay ride up @ Hanna Haunted Acres but he backed out @ the last minute. Boy am I a sore loser. So as a consolation prize he offered to take us to a late night flick @ Rave & I caved when I realized I could talk him into seeing "Let Me In". I've been superexcited about seeing this movie for a long time, so when he agreed to take us & the spawn to see it I was like, rubbing my eyes & asking for people to pinch me in my supersekrit land. We went to the 11:15 pm showing & it was still damn near packed with humanity.

I pretty much enjoyed this movie. I've never seen Let the Right One In, so I had nothing to compare it to, but Mysty is threatening to make me watch it sometime in the near future, so we shall see. I have a feeling I may be partial to Let Me In, just because I have a tendency to stick to what's been spattered across my eyeballs the first time round. Some parts kinda got boring, like restating the obvious in a lot of areas, but the rest of the movie was pretty okay. I totally dug the 70's vibe they tried to pull off. I will always be a fan of that. & that Kodi Smit-McPhee kiddo? He's pretty damn cute. I heard Snookms' pal remark that he was a clone of Mike Jr. which I could totally see. I liked his role. Chloe Moretz was what she always is in those kinda movies. She's good tho, I dig her. She's what I always wanted to portray myself as when I was a littul girl. Emotionless, y'know?

Night melded into the day by the end of all that, I can't even remembered anything that happened after the movie was over. Snookms is a pretty great movie companion to have tho, he makes the funniest remarks at the most ample of oportunes.

Sunday is my day tho! I've taken it upon myself to commit going to my mom & dad's place every Sunday night, as they are on top of all the new shows, Dexter being numero uno on their list. I've only watched a couple of eps here & there since the new season's begun, but what I did watch of it was just flawless television in my opinion. My youngest brother Chris showed up at the last Dexter get together & my mom & dad & I all dared him to be Dexter for Halloween. I should make a Facebook petition eh? Seriously, he totally looks like him & has the personality resemblance & body language as well for it. I hope he does it. It'll be like an early Christmas present for me.

My mom & dad also bought the first season of Spartacus, so them, being the gracious hosts that they are, pop in an episode each time I visit for Dexter Night. It's pretty great. I <3 the dialogue a superfuckinglot. & Lucy Lawless got me off in that first or second ep when her slave/mistress was getting her off. I was like, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"

Let's see, what else? Oh, Mysty has concocted a Twin Peaks Night as well, to begin this Thursday which I am totally looking forward to. She was able to finally get it in at her local library so away we shall go into more great television. The only things I care about television wise these days are Big Bang Theory & Dexter. I could absolutely use a Twin Peaks Night.

See man, I don't like making big long posts about all the mundane shit that happens in my life once a month. I'd like to aim for quick bursts everyday, that way I don't bore everyone to death at great lengths with what I'm talking about. If I can commit to getting on here at least once a day to keep up with my everyday agenda that'd be great.

Tumblr has been pretty great lately. I have a major Tumblr crush on velveteenrabbit. & slutwitches. They are my newest flavour o' the month. helenofdesTroy was the IT spot there for quite some time but she/he/it must have gotten busy with whatever in life distracts us because there were no posts from her/him/it for quite some time. Tumblr got pretty boring after that till I started branching out & following others. But yeah, velveteenrabbit reblogs treasure, I'm telling yew. Long lost forgotten gold that makes my heart want to dig deep for more. So yeah. That is what is up on my side of the lawn, there is a lot more behind the scenes, but nobody cares to hear about that shit on the internets.

Neon Bible

Went to Ivy Tech today & took my COMPASS placement testing. I suck at math. It was the first section I had to do too. I had to guess on every single question. I think the test just gave up on me in that department once it realized I was getting every single question wrong because it was so fucking short. But the reading and writing portions were a breeze. The test was estimated to take around 2 and half hours & I got done in about an hour and a half. I wish I didn't suck at math so badly. Oh well. That's what the testing is for I s'pose?

& like I told Paige, some guy kept farting in the test room.

I go back to register for classes in October. It's cool though cause I got a headstart with the whole financial aspect of it since I filled out my FAFSA last year. I hope all the effort I'm putting in to this comes to fruition.

I work tomorrow. I really don't fucking want to either. It has been so long since I've been able to just enjoy the warm embrace of a sleeping Snookms. All day long I fantasize about climbing into bed with him & burying my nose in his chest hairs. He has sleep paralysis tho so I have to watch out lest I get clocked in the jaw in his sleep. Scares the SHIT outta me when he wakes up in the middle of the night screaming like a fucking banshee. Wish there was something I could do to take away his terror. :(

I had a really great appt with my therapist last week. I had been dreading it all month long, as per my usual & again I was so happy I went once it was all said & done. I leave her office feeling light & hopeful, like I can accomplish anything. We've decided to move our appts back to every other week for now instead of once a month due to some of the stuff I am covering with her currently. And I'm actually looking forward to my next meet with her.

Just sitting here, listening to Cello Suite no 1 & waiting on Snookms to get home from work. I look forward all fucking day to him coming home & once he does I am so utterly tired that I literally fall asleep sitting up talking to him. I wish I could stay awake longer to hang out with him. Otherwise I don't see him again till Friday night or Saturday afternoon. My weekends with him are fucking cherished. And with the kids.

I'm realizing how much older they really are now; so far away from being the babies they once were. We're like a bunch of adults up in this house now, sharing feelings, thoughts & emotions with one another. Ideas are exchanged, musical preferences established. Movies, tv shows & video games are top conversation fodder in the household. (As long as Snookms isn't home) Because when he is home then we talk about Rambo & Sylvester Stallone a lot & the crush Snookms & I have fabricated our shespawn to have for him. We tease her that she secretly adores him but she really despises the shit outta him in real life.



(image source via artpixie)

It all started when we were watching **edit** -->"Stop or My Mom Will Shoot" <--**edit** one Saturday afternoon. We were sitting around talking about how ridiculously lame that movie is & Carmen kept going on & on about how deformed she thought Sylvester Stallone's face was. It was pretty funny but Snookms & I took it up a notch by saying that she secretly wanted to caress his jawbone. Then Snookms said she was going to get Rocky curtains put up in her room & boxing gloves to put on the four corners of her bedposts. I think I started crying at that point because I was laughing so hard. Then there was a scene in the movie where Sylvester Stallone was in his underwear sitting in his bed all doggystyle like & Snookms said Carmen was going to have a coffee table replica built of him like that. So I jumped on the floor & got on all fours & said, "Whaddoya say?" & stuck my butt out real far. Snookms was laughing pretty hard at this point. Then I said Carmen was going to get a poster of Apollo & cross his face out with a giant permanent marker.

So that was part of one of our weekends.

Man. I need another social network. Everything is getting hella boring to me again. Even Tumblr. I still love it but when nobody posts new shit I get so depressed. I'm like a lost little soul on the internet. I want something fun & engaging but also something that doesn't require too much initiative on my part. Cause I'm lazy & unstable. Pretend everything I've said here doesn't cancel out nor negate what I just said one minute ago!

& that is all.

Hey look! Things I'm getting good at!

(via ... man, I don't even know!)

So yeah, that's been the name o' the game to get me through these perilous past two weeks. Typically I am pretty decent at that, but for the bomb that was dropped on me I had to bust out the handbook, y'know? Dust it off & take notes & whatnot?

Today is a new day tho.

Yesterday was awesome, finally got to see Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. It was as joyous an occasion as I had expected it to be, the spawn & Snookms in tow as well. They were so diggin it & all giggles n toe curlin delight. Made me happy for life. The bestest battle was Ramona vs. the evil ex grrlfran. & then the Final Fantasy 2 bassline. Plus Needy's boyfriend (from Jennifer's Body?) was superexcellentcute as Neil. There's other stuff I'm prolly forgetting -- Oh! Like the Sex-Bomb-ombs! They sounded awwwwwwesome. & The Clash @ Demonhead. YEAH! Loved that rockin shit.

Today I'm hoping to venture up to Castleton Square Mall once Snookms awakes from his beauty sleep. That's the only mall I halfway enjoy going to that has a Build a Bear Factory. I need to witness the Sanrio Friends 50th Anniversary Celebration merge for myself. If only to touch the hem of it's garments? I mean like, think of the possibilities!!! Chococat dressed up like Hannah Montana, or Keroppi starring as Spaceman. Or even My Melody as Dracula! She could then possibly be initiated into Mordicai's vampire hoverboard gang.

Once that fun is over maybe a stroll in the park of parks? The King of All Parks. I hope so.

Books I've read worth mentioning as of late ...

The Catcher in the Rye



-Totally fell in love with this. The redundancy of details got kind of annoying until you realized that this is just the way Holden talks. You learn to appreciate the prose somehow once you get halfway to 3/4 of the book. It's really funny & really tragic & great for nosy people like me that have manic & trailing thoughts that lead you out of reality constantly.

A Step from Heaven by An Na -



This one is fucking SAD. I found this hidden gem @ the Riley Children's Hospital while waiting on Tha Jr. to get done with his Social Group Therapy. The staff issues tons of free books & just lies them around everywhere kind of nonchalantly & patients are allowed to bring them home & read them as long as they return them. This is about an immigrant (Young Ju) girl from Korea moving to America with her mother & father to make a promising future for themselves. The way in which An Na was able to explain pictures in words assaulted my sense of taste, touch, smell, hearing & vision so deeply I just couldn't put it down. For someone who has not been through the abuse herself, she sure describes the emotions attached to the situation quite accurately. I had to put the book down several times & dry my eyes because it was so touching. You'll see. Go read it.

I already talked about The Bell Jar right? Yeah, I'm thinking I want to find some more of Sylvia Plath's works. I had read recently somewhere that there was talk of a movie adaptation in the making? Partly produced by a one Julia Stiles, which I thought could be potentially cool? I dunno tho, could be olde news. I'm just sayin, it'd be fun to see what comes of it, y'know? Especially since she was even reading a copy of The Bell Jar in 10 Things I Hate About You. Things like that just tickle me in a way that is strange to most.

Other stuff ...

Dune! The old version? I watched this last week. Well, it was on as white noise while I was speeding through The Catcher in the Rye.

See now, my dad watched this when I was young. Like really young. & I was really sick when he watched it. So it was one of those things were I was stuck on the couch watching it & it kind of melded with my weird sick dreams & stuff, so like, I've always had these strange Dune like images embedded into the memory walls of my grey matter. When I'm in sci-fi or story mode my imagery tends to lend me that kind of visual thinking. So yeah. I'm sitting there watching Dune & fucking falling in reunited love with it & see here ... I've never read any of the novels. I know I want to, soon, but I think because I've never read them that I was able to appreciate the movie without having source material to reference from. I hear a lot of haters complain on that movie because I guess it fabricated a lot of extra bullshit that fans of the novels didn't care for too much. & I ain't here to bust their chops, because I feel you guys on that stuff. But I liked being able to enjoy this movie. Maybe not for what it WAS, but for what I was able to take away from it. The whole "My name is a killing word" biz got me all hot & bothered. & the worms. Oh heck. It is pretty much what I was hoping Star Wars would be when I was a kiddo. But I still enjoyed the ride nonetheless. So there THAT is.



Saw The Expendables the weekend before. Was pretty much what I expected & it was entertaining for the most part. Jason Statham kicks some major knife throwing ass. & don't be misled. That all star line up is nowhere near in action the way you hope it to be. Mostly a bloated Mickey Rourke crying about his past & a couple of 'guest appearances' with the Governor of California & ol' whathisface from the Sixth Sense. Dolph Lundgren tho! Oooh, shoooooweee! He still makes muh heart skip a beat after all these years. I always hated him for killing Apollo but y'know, he kicked ASS. I WILL DEFEAT YOU

I'd love to see Sylvester Stallone direct & star in the role of a Contra movie, with Dolph Lundgren as his trusty sidekick. Throw H.R. Giger's art influence in & Peter Jackson's attention to detail & who knows? We might have a winner! I don't know how they could pull the Spread Gun thingy off though.

I am going to college in January also. Taking the COMPASS/assesment testing Tuesday & then I register for classes in October. Majoring in Human Services, hoping to land a job somewhere in the special ed/counseling services department.

I just recently realized it's where my heart belongs; to those who think outside of the box & don't always have the voice everyone requires here on this Urth to say so. I want to be a guide to that voice. For Snookms. For Jr. For me & everyone else that's struggled to grasp the concept of communicating on this realm's terms. I'd do that shit for free & HAVE done it for free. I've read a decent quote that says something to the effect of "When you find your calling you'll do it for free". So yeah. Why not get paid & receive benefits if I can mean to do so?

It's been good to update here. I want to do it more often. It's just hard for me. I don't exactly know why either, I just know I'd love to get on here at least once a day & write. Hope for this to be so friends!

...

(via Anouki)

"This fall I think you're riding for -- it's a special kind of fall, a horrible kind. The man falling isn't permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom. He just keeps falling and falling. The whole arrangement's designed for men who, at some time or other in their lives, were looking for something their own environment couldn't supply them with. Or they thought their own environment couldn't supply them with. So they gave up looking. They gave it up before they ever really even got started. You follow me?"

Dirty or clean, I'm a famous machine!

(image source via helenofdesTroy)

Oh boo! This is going to be somewhat of a sick rant. But it is what I am. Pretty sure I have an ear infection. It all started on Thursday when I was working with my sister in law. We were on our way to our last house for the day & it was going on about 90 degrees with no air conditioning & I just felt my stomach wretch horribly. I almost thought I was going to shit my pants right there in the bosses' vehicle. It passed & I was fine, then another tumultous wretch. This one sent chills down me & I could just envision splattering my innerds all over some rich person's perfect carpet. So yeah, Kristi stopped, I ran into McDonald's... but NOTHING! I really had to scratch my noggin at that one. I was fine again, just a bit weak & wary of my situation. Kristi took the liberty of grabbing me an ice water & after that I took it slow for the day but I was fine. We chocked it up to maybe dehydration because it was so ridiculously hot.

I get home & my body is full of aches & weakness so I lay down until it is time to eat dinner. Still felt weak when I exerted myself physically, so I just took it really easy for the rest of the night. The next day my throat was itchy, scratchy & hurting. Mostly when I swallowed & mostly on the left side of my throat, like it was connected to my ear. By Saturday I was a mess. I woke up, not getting out of bed for like 4 hours, thinking I was okay because I was spending lotsa quality time with Snookms just chatting & giggling & watching tv & eventually sexxing each other up. As soon as I stood though, I thought I would fall over. So dizzy! Chills, aches, weakness, ear hurting & making fluttery noises to remind me of my plight all day. So I spent it mostly hibernating in my room in my Hello Kitty robe, alternating moaning with reading cause I had just picked up Sylvia Plath's "The Bell Jar" on Friday when I went to snag my mom some birthday loot @ SuperTarget. I started reading the book sometime around 4 that afternoon, stopped long enough to watch this B horror movie called The Shadow Within, eat, sleep, & pee, & I was done reading it by 3 in the morning. That book will probably get you the best experience for you money if you read it while you are physically ill! I am telling you! I sincerely felt everything Plath intended. Of course it doesn't help that I've been down her road (minus the electro-shock therapy, fuck! I can't even imagine!) but still, being ill like that made me feel really in touch with her emotions to the point that I'd cried several times in the middle of reading. It was such a beautifully tragic story & just totally was able to express so many of my sentiments exactly. The line that struck at the recesses of my heart most?

~"Everything she said was like a secret voice speaking straight out of my own bones."

By the time I finished the book I was ready for a bowl of Cocoa Krispies. I was running a temp too but it was kinda cool because I always feel kind of out of touch with everything when I am feverish. I was pretty delirious by then & the kiddoes were still awake so they totally humoured me.

Today I am nowhere near normal, my ear still aches like a motherfucker everytime I swallow & my judgement feels all cloudy right now, but I am on antibiotics so I should be back to my regularly scheduled programming in no time. Snookms has been extra super helpful & maybe it's just me but he has been looking extremely attractive while I hast been sick. I mean, I see nothing but pure beauty when I stare his way, but there is something about that 5 o'clock shadow of his that just magnetizes my appetite to his flesh when I am sick. I want to eat him. Gimme a "C'mere Spear" someboday!

There is a lot of other poignant moments I am totally forgetting to mention here, but I don't mind about not remembering at this moment. I am too sick to care; the only thing I DO care about right now is this song on repeat in my head: OVER & OVER & OVER

My best friends are Smith & Wesson

(via fuckyeahkillbill)

Oh what's this? I have time? What is that even? Because I don't even know these days!

Okay, so somehow I stumbled upon being able to have time to go to the Famous Monsters Convention with Mysty & her other bff Machell. I dragged along on Nothingness allllllll the day long, pushing through the day the way Superman surges forth on Kryptonite. I literally didn't think I was going to make it through my work day. 3 houses & I was down for the count. I srsly do not understand how my boss does it. She is made of sheer will, that woman!

So yeah, trekked through the day & got home with no time to lose; shit, shaved, & showered. Couldn't even chat! Met up @ the Metal Mansion of Mayhem & Mysty talked me into sporting fake eyelashes for the con. I never tried them before so wearing them all day felt like tunnel vision & ridiculousness but everytime I looked @ Mysty & Machell they looked adorable so I was thinking maybe I didn't look as bad as I was feeling & picturing myself to be?

We get to the hotel the con was being held at just fine, & right off there is a person struttin aboot in a Predator suit. Things got residually better from there & before you knew it I had forgotten all about wanting to die that day. There was even a Frazetta booth. I gathered up some doll hairs for an Evil Dead shirk for me, a Freddy Krueger one for Fezziwig, an Alien vs. Marvin the Martian one for shespawn & also snagged her & I an Evil Dead necklace & I gots me some Batman Returns version Catwoman earrings. They is darlin. I didn't nab any goods for Snookms because he is like a recovering meth addict when it comes to horror movies... he just tries to stay the heck away from it all since he was overexposed to it all as a kiddo I guess? Meybbee I could've grabbed some Nosferatu merch & tricked him into thinking it was Joel Osteen? Whatever though. It was great fun. Also, Mysty entered her Lily, The Wife of Halloween tattoo into the black & white tat contest & won first place too. VICTORY! She deserves it. It is such a beaut.

I came home around 9 thirty ish & took the spawn out for a White Castle dinner. Had fun eating for the first time that day & almost od'ed on the unhealthy ingestion of it all. I scarfed those little puppies down quickstyle. I came 'this close' to buying The Exorcist' @ Walmart & bringing it home to let the spawnage watch for fun spooks but thought it through a little more carefully. Oh well. Maybe next week?

Saturday I elected to take shespawn & her cousin to see the latest Twilight. What is it, Eclipse right? Yeah. I had my open minded helmet on for this latest set & you know what though? I liked it. I really really liked it. I keep hearing all this stuff about how Bella's whooped & how Bella can't make a decision for herself & that she needs a dude in her life to go on, but I did not get that impression. The whole movie I was looking really far into it all, waiting for her passiveness to anger or outrage me, but it did not. Maybe everyone is just sippin on the hatorade because she has two gorgeous young boys fighting for her & they both give her the room to be snuffleupagus with the boths of em. & this was freaking my shit out BIG TIME but Jacob is SHARKBOY. Shespawn told me about halfway through the movie, & perhaps it is olde news to everyone else but I was like, "OMFG NO FUCKING WAYYYYY!!!" I felt so ashamed for drooling all the fuck over him throughout the movie, considering I could've been changing his diapers 12 years ago. FAKKKK. But see here, I am typically Team Edward (if I was to choose a team, which I do, I even have the shirt to prove it & shespawn haz team Jacob so I can tell her to piss off) but watching Eclipse made me wanna request a very shallow Team Transfer. Cause Edward was sporting the Fugly big time. I don't know what it was either, because again, I am usually thinking he is the cuter/better personality typed one of the crew. But WHATEVER. Fine. I drooled over the epic wolf muffin boy. But GOD did he deserve it. Even though he was an aggressive ass the whole time. I giggled embarrassingly loud in the theater when Jacob told Edward, "Besides, we all know I'm hotter than you"...

ENUFF OF THAT. I am broken hearted because Green Leaf, our local bubble tea haunt, is now closed on Sundays. I guess the hot Vietmanese chick has to go to church on Sunday. Wahhhhh.

Other stuff. What else! I can't ever remember anymore. Oh, 4th of July. Or rather, 3rd.... was fun. My mom & dad took it upon themselves to celebrate early so as not to cut into other pressing in law engagements on Snookms' end o' the schtick. The Renegade Wizard made some champion ass shishkabobs, chicken, & ribs on the barbeque. Just thinking about them right now is getting mah shit all aroused. Had a lot of good chuckles on account of my brothers. They even noticed that my hair was straightened! How's that for good ol' family lovin? Erin, aka Malakai, kept complimenting me on my hair & my octo/lego necklace & Mysty's pants, & then gave me ironic props when he saw me wearing Let-Dawg's Hollister shirk with Mysty's gothic pants of destruction the day before. HE's so good to meh.

Most of the conversation of my family revolves heavily around the latest movies we've seen or tv shows we've watched & then when Erin & I get in close quarters with one another it is then expanded even further to gaming, books & spirituality. I told him about how I found Ico @ Disc Replay for 30 bucks & he said it was probably one of the most well spent 2 hours of his life he'd ever had with a game. I started playing it last week but only made it to the first couch/save point after you get the princess out of the cage & haven't been able to pick it back up since. But so far I am seeing what everyone has said about it. A very mystical ambient quality to it that is rare to capture in gaming these days. Sort of gives me that warm familiar sensation that Legacy of the Wizard or even Dragon Warrior once had the ability to invoke within me? I am looking forward to gettng back into it this week while I have a few days off. Wish me luck!

My brother & I also talk a lot about writing & dreams when we get even deeper into our convo, but these days there ain't hardly time for all that. He likes to have dreams about getting possessed while I dream about spiders floating around my face that have special revelations encrypted into their movements about the end of the world. So between the two of us there is always a lot of fun stuff to chat up about.

Oh! & Snookms got a new job! It don't pay nearly as much as what he's got now, but it's far more stable than where he's at & we'll have insurance. Woo hooo! Wut the heck is that? So yeah, he's supposed to start in 2 weeks, so glad they are a respectable enough company to understand the importance of putting that in, y'know? He'll be working for the city, doing who knows what in the water department. He seems pretty happy & hopeful about it, a lot more hopeful than I've seen him in some time and that my friends, sounds good to me.

My bro Eric came over & spent the night 2 nights in a row with his daughter sometime last week too. I came home from work one afternoon to find that he had cleaned my whole kitchen for me, & then he was sitting @ the dining room table all damn night working on new floor plans for our whole house! Because that's how he rolls. He is pretty much better than David Bromstad. Had me all excited & optimistic for our minimal way of living right now. He's such a wizard when it comes to interior design. I am encouraging him full force to get into a school that will help nurture his knack for beautiful living; I just hope that it takes. He could make me a rich bitch one day, y'know?

Well I'm all thunk out about what to say, plus I'm starting to get Tumblr withdrawals, so away I will go to see if anyone has reblogged funny stuff about how ridiculously beautiful SHARKBOY is in the new Twilight.

Iron Girl

Went to a Floor show with Mysty on Wednesday & am still recovering from the vastness of it's impression upon me. The vocalist who is also the guitarist who is mesmerizing was wearing a Melt Banana shirt. His lyrics consist of being gay. Their sound, to me, resembles a cross between The Melvins & Melt Banana, but with the singer sounding like something quite original. We were at The Dojo, like, a few doors down from The Emerson in a tiny garage like building that consisted of 1 ceiling fan, a smoke machine & 50 man-sweaty punks. Mysty merged her way to the front where all the action was & I followed after her like a lost little puppy. My choice proved to be profitable though, cause my foot got smashed by some fool that was joshing around the vocalist once he decided to throw himself bodily into the small but devout crowd of jeering fans while still wailing away on his axe. It was was great. My right ear is still recovering from standing next to the PA system sans ear protection.



Also, ELVISH MEME.



rach (rhach) = curse

el = star

Cursed star! Ha!

M.I.A.

It's been awhile! I keep wanting to update here, especially with the new layout & such but I just haven't been able to bring myself to it. WHAT IS THAT!? I hate it!

I'd love to come here & update every day or every other day like I used to way back in the day, but it's just so different now since I started working outside of the home. Christ! I don't even know WHAT I do anymore. My new mission in life is to locate a flawless toilet? Fuck that noise.

Life has been mostly about sneaking a laugh with Snookms, or taking David to cello practice or having meaningful video game conversations with shespawn & Jr. In between I sleep & scrub rich people's posessions to a glimmering shine, or at least help my sister in law make it so. I cook stuff more now since we magically have less income these days, been on a filipino cuisine kick as of late. Lumpia, pansit, sinagan (sp?)...

I threw a huge temper tantrum (meaning I cussed in front of my kids) because the lumpia wrappers I bought sucked miserably. They were falling apart even as shespawn & I peeled them apart from one another. & then when we wrapped the ingredients with them they tore even moreso. It was frustrating as hell because you just spend so much time prepping ingredients & not to mention the cost of all that stuff. Going out at the last minute to buy lumpia wrappers is so not an option in Indiana. But whatever. We got it done, improvised what we could, they came out fine. I felt bad for throwing a hissy fit at first though.

As for David's cello practice, it's been going pretty okay. I say okay because he hasn't been practicing afterwards for 20 minutes a day like he's supposed to. He catches on really fast & gets bored easily when he's waiting for the others to latch on to what's being taught, so then he goofs off until it's showtime. I have had to rearrange my work schedule in order to take him everyday, he goes Monday - Thursday for an hour each day & it falls right in the middle of my usual working agenda. But it's been nice to sit & enjoy hearing him & the other kids in his class play. There is a surprising medley of emo-looking kiddoes in his group & they all play pretty great. The 2 teachers are a lot of fun to watch too, they aren't all like, uptight? I guess I would say? Like how you might imagine a cello teacher to be? They really remind me of comic book characters or something. One is a blonde & she's pretty cute. She makes me think of Violet from The Incredibles for some reason. I guess the way she talks & her sense of humour. She has this funny 'thing of the day' that she has the kids do before they all are dismissed & one day it was 'bumping fists', another day it was '3 snaps & a Z formation' & then today she had them do some really funny disco moves. The other teacher will blast Apocalyptica after the lesson's over in order to encourage & motivate the students. I think my favourite cover they do is 'Fade to Black'. I started getting all teary eyed & was thankful I had my sunglasses to hide underneath. That is the first song I remember Snookms playing & he did it so breathtakingly well considering he was only 17 @ the time. Most folks I knew then only had the rhythm part of the song down & when I heard him take it even further by playing the lead as well, well my jaw just dropped in adoration. Him having a ponytail with hair longer than mine didn't help much neither.

Learned how to change the radiator in our car somewhere in between all that time too. Our car kept overheating, mostly making that nasty scorching metal stench, so Snookms looked under the hood but couldn't see anything. We heard sizzling everytime we parked though & there was some steam coming out from the hood. When our intarwebz got shut off it made us do stuff that was more important than watching NCIS & logging onto Tumblr, so we figured we'd better take care of the radiator. It really wasn't as difficult as I initially imagined it to be, but @ the same time, there were a lot of hoses & bolts that we hadn't foresaw when we finally dug our claws deep enough into it. The first bolt I tried removing fucking busted! I felt foolish, but it wasn't enough to scare me off. Helping Snookms with this stuff always reminds me of how much I wanted to be an auto mechanic in high school. Sometimes I get a fever! & the only cure for it is, MORE MONKEY GREASE. But seriously though! I took an aptitude test when I was a senior & it had me most compatible with attaining an airframe & powerplant license. I about jumped for joy because that's what my dad did his whole life. Working on airplanes, that is. I suck for not pursuing that. Long story; some other day.

I wanna say that I've watched some movies, but I don't think I have. Oh wait! Toy Story 3! & the new Karate Kid! I almost forgot all about those. I think there was another movie in there somewhere but I can't even remember. Maybe it was Robin Hood? If that's the case I already talked about that. But Toy Story 3 was pretty cute. It made me cry, but not like part 2 did. I think part 2 will always be my favourite. But 3 had it's moments. Lotso Huggin Bear started to remind me of my Footprint bear I snuggled with for years, even well into my adult life. But then when he turned out to be a jerkface I was like FORGET YOU! Footprint is flawless in my eyes.

Also the new Karate Kid was fun to watch. I didn't find myself nodding off or my mind wandering because I was getting bored & I tell you what! Jaden Smith is freaking stacked for a little kiddo. He is hella cute too. That's right I'll say it. The whole "jacket on, jacket off" thing was pretty cool, but I was hoping there'd be more variation on the repetive trick practices other than that. & I guess there was some hype about the fighting style not actually being karate too, but I am not here to dismiss or get offended. I am Raistlin in the red robes neutral about it all I s'pose. I can understand either 'plight', or rather, sympathize I should say?

As far as t.v. goes I haven 't been able to keep up on much. I started to get back on the True Blood bandwagon but fell off right quick once Snookms' vacation was over. & he just now had HBO dropped from our Comcast plan so I'm all a' heart broken over that. But I can always rent the remainder of the second season from the video store or something. I keep hearing everyone gossip about it on Facebook & it is getting my panties all up in a ridiculous bunch. I miss hearing Bill say "ohbsal've" to Sookie. Cause like, he is so motherfucking gorgeous.

New eps of Degrassi start up in July, it is all shespawn & I ever talk about anymore. That, & who would play who in the Full Metal Degrassi mashup we have concocted for our own amusement. I say Johnny DiMarco is Ed. Shespawn says no because he cut all his hair off now, but I say SO WHAT! & then we giggle & say Holly J. can be Al, because she has a cute voice. Or maybe even Claire! Whaddoya say fellers? But whatever. It passes the time.

I like how Riley & Zane are making out in the previews for Degrassi. Riley still kind of appears repugnant to me just because he was such a dick in the beginning, but now that he is hooking up with Zane & being less hesitant about showing his affections to him it warms the cockles of my heart a bit. Slowly but surely.

It was Jr's b-day on Sunday but we had his actual celebration Saturday since we didn't have the heart to drag all the dads out on Father's Day. He got his own laptop! & I ordered the 1st & 2nd Halloween movies in the series off Amazon (the old ones) since he's so hardcore obsessed with Michael Myers. Also added a Michael Myers shirt to the cart too, just came today as a matter o' fact. It's funny to see Jr. overtly pleased. He tries to conceal his grimace. Too cute!

Other than that, not much else. S'posed to grab some bubble tea with Katie tomorrow/tomarrow & then a wikked/awesome soopersekrit underground show with Mysty on Wednesday. Let-dawg sent me random (or rather, completely without purpose as Snookms likes to sarcastically phrase it to make everyone feel dumb for overusing the word) giftage too! Another mixed cd & Whale Rider which made me giggle because I already own it but was touched nonetheless.

On the writing front there has been a whole lotta nada which I fucking hate. I get sad when I realize I don't write the way I used to. There is a part of me that dies a little bit inside for everyday that I don't write when it wants me to. I call it 'The Creative One' & it doesn't even resemble a person. It's a pillar with storm clouds & lightning bolts hovering above & it doesn't speak in words but rather communes in a Cthutonic kind of lexis. I am dead serious here. Don't even think I am trying to make this shit up.

But yeah. The last ANY kind of writing I did was about a dream I had about this Eminem dopelganger & it was when our webz were broke so I typed it up on Microsoft Word when I was trying to do some 'parts work' that my therapist assigned me. It felt good to let loose, y'know? I really want to write more. When I wrote Lucifer's Scar I realized the importance of writing everyday in order to enlarge my capacity to express.

I hope to afford you all more clarity in the future.

SKULLY!

Ack. I dunno what's wrong here but I am always trying to avoid updating here these days? I kind of hate it because it's so conflicting. But it's a thing I feel I need to do. Weird.

Maybe I just need a layout makeover to make me more excited about coming here? I mean, don't get me wrong, I love giving out updates & talking out my ass, & I also love staying caught up on my favourite blogs, but I just feel as though it's so 'blah' around here. Yeah, I think maybe I'll brighten things up around here for the summer.

Let's see here, so much to talk about!

The kiddoes are all out on summer break. Really excited about that. Things tried to go all lemonade on our asses there for a bit but I like sour shit, SO THERE LIFE! Seriously though, man, it had me down in the dumps for a bit. But I fought it back? With getting back into Silent Hill 3! That game is damn near perfect. Maybe not SOTN perfect, but quite effing close friendo/oes. I am completely in love with the soundtrack. The spawn & I beat it last week & it pretty much gave me a reason to get up in the morning there for a little while y'know? One of those kind of things. Well, Snookms & the kiddoes are ALWAYS the reason I get up, but well, you know how it is when you play a game you totally dig. It's the first thing you think about when you wake up; the last thing you think about before you go to bed. I wonder how Jesus feels about that? I think it's okay. I wouldn't be mad.

So yeah. I'm kind of laughing @ how Heather deals with the situations she's presented with tho... "OMG, this is SO NOT MY STYLE!" & whatnot. & when she says "bitch" it's pretty cute?

Now we have the unlimited sub machine gun mode unlocked & the kiddoes are on a mission to get the possessed ending & the whatever beam ending. I forget what it's called.

I think that another reason why I am loathing updating here is because I am not good with remember certain detailed facts. When I am not for certain, I just try to wing it, or I research it on the intarwebz to make for certain, right? Well, I don't like having to do that all the goddamn time just for the sake of not sounding like a pretentious twat. But I guess I can do that all on my own regardless eh?

Other such goings on are that I am super addicted to Pride & Prejudice right now. The Keira Knightley/Matthew Macfadyen one? OH SNAP that is such a ridiculously romantic movie! I am a huge sucker for the romance, no matter how much I try to lie to myself about it. Darcy, oh sweet Mr. Darcy. I want to see you pretend to be Alucard one day. I think the part that makes me cream in muh jeans most is when he & Elizabeth are @ the private ball @ Mr. Bingley's (goddamn he is quite the adorable one as well, no?) & Darcy says very subtly, "I hope to afford you more clarity in the future"... & the room goes silent & empty as if they two are the only ones in the room. You KNOW Keira's knees were a'bucklin over that. I get superstoopid over that scene.

She-spawn & I have been frequenting this new Green Leaf haunt down the way as of late. I spotted it back a few months ago & came to an epiphany one day driving home from SuperTarget: "HOLY SHIT! IT'S A BUBBLE TEA FRANCHISE!" So the next ample opportune that came I grabbed the she-spawn & we mosied on down there. Pretty cute place, really small, I had no idea what to expect really. At one point I was like, "Um kay, is bubble tea just carbonated tea?" So when I get there & it is all vietmanese franchise I am like "oh snap! It's almost Goldilocks up in here..." I was meg delighted. There is a supercute employee doll that she-spawn & I are crushing on there. She's got the most beautiful hair & she has the exact same complexion as my momma. So I haz Oedipus complex somewhat. SUE ME!

We tried the strawberry milk tea the first time & got some spring rolls to go. She-spawn totally digs em but I am more of the eggroll fan here. So the next time I got those & tried the taro green milk tea which I love way more than the strawberry. I find myself fiending for a black ball o' glycerin to chew upon after awhile though. The taro green stuff makes me want avocado ice cream from Lee's supermarket though. It's really creamy & the colour is just beautiful in a cup. I love the uber epic straws too. She-spawn totally wanted to stock up on them. I was like, "No! Save them for others too woman!"

It was so funny too because she-spawn & I went to Walmart today to do groceries & saw the bubble tea girl we are crushing on & she was wearing the cutest summer dress & drinkin the taro green. She saw us & was all happy & cute about it. She was with her boyfriend, which she-spawn & I totally did the 'knowing' nod over cuz we kinda suspected that they may have been an item when we saw them working together. He is the whitest caucausian I ever seen in mai life tho. & he was workin them counters like nobody's business. GOOD FOR HIM! They will have irresistable babies should they elect to reproduce.

The other big news is that Snookms is on vacation! He surprised me! Totally... He came home Friday, called all the members of the Turner abode together family meeting style & was all, "I got good news & bad news. Bad news is I have to work tomorrow/tomarrow (which was a Saturday) but the good news is I'm off for the rest of the week." I was dumbfounded? He is also getting it paid, which is a luxury we are not accustomed to affording round here. There's been a couple of vacations like that but most of them have been at the risk of losing a week's worth of resources. So we have fun stuff planned but nothing backbreakingly spectacular just because we are getting old & wanna take it easy. We saw the new Robin Hood flick late last night, it was okay. It was what I figured it would be. I knew the kids would be bored but I figured they could use a couple boring movies in their life. Gives em character.

I've discovered the awesomeness that is Tumblr too, via Paige, one of Mysty's acquaintances. I like it way better over there than I do here as of late. It is where I found these 2 gems anyway... (amongst so many others)





*sources via enchanteddoll.com*

The top one is pretty much how I picture the wil o' wisp to look in Mordicai's "Wil o' Wisps & Other Illuminated Manuscripts" book; right down to a tee. She likes to yell out "SKULLY!" when she hates. & she does it so adorably! & the bottom doll I just ogle & ogle over for hours. It is quite adorable. I have a thing for nautical helms, leave me alone! It most be that one episode of Scooby Doo or something.

Katie's birthday party was held @ Robbie's on Saturday night. Trekked my way out there without too much trouble. I had stopped by Disc Replay beforehand to grab a few quick gifts & found Brutal Legend & 2 other movies for her. She seemed to like them just fine. I managed to snag Silent Hill, Shaun of the Dead & Mysterious Skin whilst I was there too. I can't wait to rewatch Mysterious Skin, I've been telling Mysty all about it. Rewatched Silent Hill today, this time with a different perspective since I actually played one of the games for a worthwhile amount of time. Also I let the spawn watch it with me since I didn't let them watch it when it first came out. They were still pretty sheltered from a lot of stuff then, didn't want to traumatize them with a bunch of stuff that I myself could not bring myself to explain to them at the time, y'know? But I liked it even better this time around, was able to appreciate the soundtrack way more at least. The kiddoes enjoyed it as well, were appropriately spooked & such.

@ Robbie's we I mostly played Rock Band, I even got to play on the drums! I liked it a lot & am now scheming & devising a plan in which I have some for our abode by the end of this summer break. I played on medium mode for a bit & got brave to do Hard, fucked up the second song in the set & chickened out, going back to medium. It was so boring though so I said fuck it & went back to Hard & did okay. I really got jazzed over playing "Welcome Home" by Coheed & Cambria on Hard Mode. It wasn't no joke, but I managed to make it through the song. Robbie made cheesecake which I didn't get to try & also chocolate covered strawberries which I did get to try & they were just as tasty as I'd always imagined them. Other things that were tasty was Katie in her pretty dress with her new hairz being all drunken & giggly & Robbie just being Robbie in general. He has this look. It gets me everytime.

I went to Mysty's house a bunch last week, what, I think at least 3 times, or maybe it was the week before? Heck, I dunno! All's I know is that we had a jolly good ol' time just hanging out on her front porch, enjoying the electric air, smoking, chatting, laughing. She showed me her collection of The Doors stuff she has & I was just totally in love with her dedication to such a thing. Her sister had brought by a bunch of her old stuff that had just been laying around for years in random boxes & she dug out a bunch of old Doors records. She put em on & we just scampered around her abode living life & enjoying being in each others'. By the time I left it was almost 2 & we were both equally spooked cause we were talking about exorcisms, remote viewing & our conspiracy theories regarding the C.I.A. She's so cute when she's paranoid!

Now I am about to assist Snookms in the culinary department. He is making breakfast for dinner with all the trimmins; homemade sausage gravy, biscuits, bacon, eggs, french toast & sausage. WOOOOOOT!

Symphony of the Night!

For those of you that are unfamiliar with the epic win that is Castlevania; Symphony of the Night, here is a rundown of it for you, told from the perspective of my 10 year old She-Spawn, who had to write an essay of choice for school & which she chose this as her vocation:

"It is the year 1792 in my video game Castlevania; Symphony of the Night, when Alucard has the mission of killing his greedy father Dracula to save the human race. Dracula is the king of vampires. The main character's name is Alucard (Dracula spelled backwards.)

When your finally done with the first level Death steals all your weapons from you. But as you go through the game you get a lot more powerful weapons that are better and you get back the ones you start out with. After you beat the final boss Richter Belmont, if you have a special thing you can turn the castle upside down. Then you do a lot of the other stuff.

Next you fight the dark priest Shaft and FINNALLYYY! DRACULA!!!!

Before you fight him, you have to do a lot of stuff. First you start at the Chapel where you kill Medusa like the one from Clash of the Titans. Next you go to Orlox's Lair where you fight a mummy as stinky as a sewer rat. After that you go to the Reverce (<----that is how it's really spelled) Caverns and fight the clone of yourself the Doppelganger. Then after that you go to the Abandon Mine where you fight the Grim Reaper (Death) when he threatens to feast on your soul. Then you go to the Floating Catacombs and fight the toughest boss in the game Galamoth. After that you go to the Alchemy Laboratory where you fight Beelzebub. (Here She-Spawn even takes the liberty of drawing an adorable little fly hovering above the word 'Beelzebub') Beelzebub is the fly you kill. I can't remember the Zombie's name but it's probably as stinky as a stink bomb considering there's a swarm of flies forming around it and maggots falling off it.

Next I went to Castle Keep where I got an ultra rare sword called the Crissaegrim. Dracula is only supposed to raise once every century but if you collect the heart of Dracula after you beat the bosses then you'll get to fight him. Sometimes you'll only get a life max up likeat the Colliseum when you kill the 3 false heroes, the same at the Clock Tower when you fight the evil bat monster. then you fight the dark priest Shaft, then finally DRACULA.

After that he starts saying a bunch of things then it's over and it plays a song that sounds like it would be playing at an old folks home or on an old depressing 1970's Japanese anime.

Oh, yeah, I HATE THE BORING SONG!!! Well that's my summary!

(& then she drew a picture of Alucard)

S'very endearing. MeSoProud!

"WHO ARE YOU?!

My loins hath brewed up a new brand of evil for the morning. It is in no way as delightful as it might sound.

Mother's Day... I'll start with that. Well, the weekend of it anyhow.

My spawn are so hobbit like in the gift giving department, they cannot wait to relinquish their presents, y'know? She-spawn got right on making me an Otep shirt, I told you guys all about that. Then the starshaped bowl that Fezziwig bestowed as gift upon me. That was all Friday. Saturday She-Spawn begged Snookms to take her to Disc Replay & they bought me the limited edition of Akira! Her in I slapped it in right away, watched it all the way through only taking breaks long enough to gather junk food rations. She was really engrossed into the movie, I'd kinda figured she would be; she's just intriguing like that.

The next day Snookms took us for ice cream to Baskin Robbins & bought me a ridiculously large bouquet of sunflowers & daisies, cause he knows I be jockin sunflowers like mad. Also grabbed me an Itunes card in which I flooded with great muzaks.

"Happy Mother's Day To Me!" Is what I titled the cd:

1. Someone Great -LCD Soundsystem
2. Nautilus -Depreciation Guild
3. Fade Into You -Mazzy Star
4. Astral Projection to Rabid Hell -Urgehal
5. Cellar Door -Michael Andrews
6. Reflection of the Television -The Twilight Sad
7. Unfavorable Meanings -Teenage Panzerkorps
8. Transmission -Joy Division
9. Rebellion (Lies) -Arcade Fire
10. Only Pain -Unsane
11. Black Bile -Graves at Sea
12. Boris -Melvins (I really wanted the Isis/Agoraphopic Nosebleed cover but couldn't find it!)
13. Big Empty -Stone Temple Pilots
14. 2:45 A.M. -Elliot Smith

So I've been cranking that real loud & driving my spawn crazy with it. & Snookms too. Oh how I love to make him hate things!

So like after all o' that we headed down to Snookms' moms' pad to well wish her a Happy Mother's Day. Snookms step dad made a turkey & we had turkey sandwiches & watched Blind Side. Good movie. I had a huge crush on "Big Mike" the whole movie & kept snickering everytime anyone said his name cause that's what I call Snookms when he refuses to respond to "Snookms".

When we were done there we headed out to my mom's & dad's to drop off the 2 containers of Jamocha Almond Fudge I nabbed her from Baskin Robbins. See, that shit is treasure in our family cause all the Baskin Robbins in our area are pretty much extinct. Have to travel FarAndWide for that shit now...

So she was all squeeing & eeekin over it like I had hoped she would. She is such a great gift receiver. She got me a really cute top from some store in Metropolis that I keep forgetting the name of. She also bought me a 'Bella bracelet" cause I've been tryna nab hers from her wrist for like, an eternity & a day & shit. Mine's brown. Her's is black. & she has a white one too now. Ho-HUM! *Oh! You must have dropped this!*

Didn't get to stay & play for too long, as the hour was growing late. Came home & got the kiddoes all tuckered in bed. Snookms & I did fun stuff but I can't even remember what it was. He's been a real joker lately. Making me giggle with flexing his muscles in the mirrors when he knows I'm watching, starts kissing them & stuff till I explode with laughter. That kind of a thing.

Oh! Also! That night, when I walked to the mailbox to put a check in the mail for our kiddoes' insurance? There was a package in the mail from Let-Dawg! She took the time to send me a card & a most ADORABLE golden owl necklace. It has aqua blue eyes & an amber jeweled tummay. SO PRECIOUS! It was all moist & cold from being in the mailbox all night, which only added to it's irresistable allure.

Monday was back to work; went to do an initial clean on a new house that Kristi agreed to start doing. Wasn't too bad, the woman's got a Maserati (sp?) in her driveway though! Cute little abode, nothing too backbreaking right? She pays us more & more money as we progress though the house, realizing how "good of a job" we are doing. By the time we got outta there our pockets were stuffed with 30 dollar tips! How cool is that, right?

Later that night I looked forward to Big Bang Theory, pretty much the only light at the end of the dreary Monday tunnel aside from seeing Snookms & the spawns when they get home. Big Bang Theory is pretty much the only show I brake for these days. It was Lost for the longest time, but I have given up on the show for now just because I am so motherfucking behind. I refuse to watch the last episode not knowing what the fuck has been going on for the last 3 seasons. At least that is what I am telling myself so that I can resist the temptation for next Wednesday... or is it Tuesday? Or is it THIS week? See!!! I am a MESS!

But Big Bang Theory. This show pleases me to an obscene degree. Sheldon has me swooning & giggling in toe curling delight, & his 3 pals ain't far behind. Sheldon reminds me of 3 parts Jr. (my oldest spawn), & 1 part Erin (my oldest brother, but I am STILL older than him & can beat him up so don't even try). Everybody loves Sheldon. Mordicai kind of reminds me of him too, but Mordicai is definately a far more fashionably aware version of Sheldon. Just with his technicalities & things he gets excited over? It's pretty funny & delightful.

Thursday I got paid & had Friday off so's I took Snookms out on a dinner date to Texas Roadhouse, his choice. I'd never been so I didn't know what to expect. Final verdict? I love the atmosphere, but I'm not to keen on the food. It's too much like domisticated food for my liking. & there is some semblance of sweetness in every food you order there, no matter WHAT it is. I don't like that! But we still had our enjoyment either way, we don't need good food to have fun.

Headed over to SuperTarget across the street to stock up on rations for the weekend; bought the spawn some "Hey, I love you & I see what you've been doing there" kind of items & dilly-dallied home. Kiddoes put to bed & Snookms & I finished up watching '10 Things I Hate About You'; it was Encore or something or another. Snookms secretly adores this movie, I can feel it in my bones. He faithfully giggles when Heath Ledger smacks that cop on the butt during the ever-so-charming singing scene. & the whole, "I have a dick on my face, don't I" thing? Poignant moments in our life, people!

After Snookms nodded off on the couch I slipped away to take care of my hair business. & when I say business, BOY DO I MEAN BUSINESS! Lotta werk to be done there folks. See, I shave the back of my head, like, not half way but maybe a third of the way (though there was a point when I was shaving it even past the halfway mark) & I have a bad habit of not keeping up on it. So when I tie my hair up it looks like I've just hacked all my hair off & you see these questionable roots furling up underneath it all, which just makes it look like my hair is really short. So yeah, I had that to attend to. I used to keep up with it all the time in high school but damn! It's hard to scrape up time for that shit these days? So I did that up real quick & then proceeded to bleach half of my bangs so I could dye them purple for the next day. Feels so good to go to bed with a freshly shaved scalp!

So Friday I awoke with a beastly vigor, ready for the new day ahead. It was movie night @ Robbie's & I am falling in super mad love with Robbie real fukken quick. He was that boy in high school with a trench coat, wearing an Art of Noise tshirt & being snarky to whom deserved it & unscathingly romantic to those who didn't. His words drip so effortlessly from his maw, & I am puddy in his hands I am telling yew! I'm sure he's turned hundreds of tricks this way...

So blue black dye was in the cards for my hairs that day, along with the purple for my bangs. Took a lot less time & effort than I had initially proposed for myself, but I was still tired after it all. By the time darkness descended I was ready to just plop on Robbie's red couch & sleep.

But instead Mysty, Katie, Robbie & I watched Bitchslap, which was descent. Robbie says it's what Tarantino's movies SHOULD be, but I like the Tarantino flicks just fine the way they are. Still some decent moments in the movie though. The girl on girl action was pretty hot & I really liked the nun scene too. We were s'posed to watch Immortal after that but I just wanted to be a chatty Kathy instead. Robbie took it upon himself to pop in The Cure's Disintegration live dvd to play as white noise whilst we sat & learned more about each other. I am so in love with Weekend Evenings @ Robbie's House...

Katie has me cracking up with the way she laughs & what she laughs at. We are one in the same in that manner of thinking.

Other fun moments in the week worth mentioning was going to the park on Sunday with Snookms & the spawn tribe. We haven't been since last summer, so it was a real treat. This park we go to is the king of the woods as far as parks go; it has the most secluded, wooded areas that you could know of. They are at every corner, I am telling you. & a bridge! A creek! Here to make all your RPG fantasies come true. I am a sucker for secluded wood areas; get over me!

The kiddoes had fun veering off the paths to find their own, while Snookms & I messed around with some potsmoking teenagers who thought they were being discreet. Ahhhh! How I miss them days...

We will be going back every weekend prolly, such great adventure there.

Back around to Monday, all about Big Bang Theory of course. Later on that night Snookms & I stayed up too late watching Robocop. This movie was intense for me as a kiddo, but so fucking mesmerizing. Murphy! "Who are YOU? WHO ARE YOU?!" & that melting jerk of rat in the poo sewage? It's always great to know you & the spouse were paying attention to all the same parts of Robocop as a kid. Says a lot about a person...

Read this book if!...

You must absolutely, positively read Mordicai Knode's book Watchtower Gothic if:



1! You listen to Electric Wizard & enjoy it whether you smoke pot or naught.

2! You play D&D now or ever in your life.

3! You like anything I care about at all.

4! Know what homunculus are...

5! Appreciate the art of this beautifully orchestrated melody...

6! Think that the name Mordicai is cataclysmically awesome.

7! Like to play and/or sympathize with Kender the most. (because of the unintentionably adorable factor of this book!)

8! Find insanely macabre things adorably endearing.



You must ESPECIALLY read this book if:



You play or claim to live along the alignment of a Lawful Evil.



So. With that being said, I really adored this book. This is the second book of Mordicai's I have read, his first being Wil O' Wisps & Other Illuminated Manuscripts, (as if that wasn't enough to get my crusty undies in a bunch what with his terribly clever & innovative use of face icons from them oldskool Word Perfect programs as a means for Wil O' Wisp communications) which was a winning NaNoWriMo participant from the year before Watchtower Gothic.



If anybody knows anything about Mordicai (of which I know very little, but the little that I have gathered from faithfully reading his most excellent blog) they would know that he has a knickety knack for making the Darkness adorable. Delectable. Irrrrresistable. There is only one other kat in this world that I know of has that ability over me & that is Neil Gaiman. & honestly? Mordicai kind of tops him in my book. I mean, don't get me wrong, I am all up on The Sandman's tip. & all the fuck over Silas from The Graveyard Book. But dear sweet Gillick Bootblack! I can't decide if I'm going to love you more as the preteen Alpha you once were, or the most notorious Blackhearted war criminal of all the Known Worlds & beyond!



So there is that!



Now that I've gotten that outta the way, let me just say that these two visual/audio companions stuck with me all throughout. & if anyone begs to differ please don't hesitate to steer me in the more clarifying direction?



THIS!



& then ...



THIS!!



Yeah. There is this Alizarin Red character, most charming & in a wheel chair. You know ol' Mordicai has got something in his pocketses, BUT WHAT IS IT?! Wait & see, WAIT & SEE. She is beautiful in a most terrible & beautiful way. & this is one of Gillick Bootblack's (the main man of the story) companions in this adventure.



Then you have Blondie. I switch back & forth all throughout the story on who is my favourite, but I do believe my heart belongs to her. As I've mentioned before! SHE USES CURSE WORDS SO APPROPRIATELY! But that is not the point.



I have a hard time pinpointing this. Not only in Master M's book, but in all books. I miss the point cause I get caught up in the adventure. But here is what I am guessing at?



Gillick, my main man, is like, an Alpha? Which is a language I'm not too keen on due to my parents sheltering me & my kin from too much exposure to the land of magicks, but I'm guessing is one bad ass creation of race.



He is in this Watchtower of sorts, in a realm where the Unity works strictly together to better this realm, use the bones of what the inhabitants of the past have been forced to reckon with & make the most of it's leftovers. Gillick is in the aftermath, the Unity's attempt to make the world a better place? He grows up in a sort of alchemist's foster home, learning the lore & this first book discusses the charming childhood of Gillick, before he became known as "A Most Notorious War Criminal of all the Known Worlds & beyond".



He ventures out on his birthday to meet up with his two newly acquainted pals Alizarin & Blondie, with nothing but his good natured but carefully calculated intentions on his shirtsleeve.



An Aleister Crowley-ish kind of dude in charge of the haunted house takes them the way for the rest of their ride, as they decide to celebrate at The Carnivale of all the lovely places in the Urth!



There is sort of an "alluding to" of what might have happened in those last few moments they shared in the haunted house the 3 companions agreed to walk through together, but it isn't til the very end that you get any idea of what truly takes place. To bridge that most questionable of gaps is letters...



...Letters from Gillick to Blondie to Alizarin & back. As they part ways the particular Carnivale events seems to me the tie that bonds them, all along they speak of it very vaguely, only teasing the very itchy spot you want so badly to scratch in wondering just what the heck happened in that creepy haunted house to the 3 of them.



The letters exchanged at first seem daunting when you see that they go on til damn near the end of the book, until you realize how adorably important they are in further mapping out the "true" nature of Gillick in all his intentions.



Revolution is his name friends! Docents? Citizens...? Yeah. So Gillick applies his previous knowledge attained from his schooling as a potential alchemist & combines it with the worldly experiences that he, Alizarin & Blondie share to attempt a global upheaval of the functioning society as we know it, linguistics being (as far as what I took of it as least!) a top fucking priority.



& you can totally see where Gillick is coming from in all of this. You hear him question Blondie's motive in her eagerness to swear like a truck driver, & he is so goddamn careful to choose his own words. Something I kind of see emulate itself in Mordicai as well.



Either way, he is a decent fellow, that Mordicai dude, & I'd recommend this book to anyone who digs the aforementioned, because it is just THAT FUN OF A READ.



Also! Stayed tuned for a possible Book 2 in the Watchtower series next NaNo!

Out of sorts!

(Apologizing beforehand for any weird timeframe mistakes, I wrote this particular entry before I did Mordicai's book review but wanted to make sure I put that up ASAP.)

So, yeah... FUCK ME WITH A CANDLESTICK!

Anniversary week! Last week? It was fun! OH so FUN. Snookms & I didn't even have much money to play around with either, but it was prolly the best anniversary we've had yet.

I think it has to do with how close we've become over the years, 14 years... We were able to get over that hump that makes us feel like we were robots instead of lovers, & after that everything has been TITS for us. We can joke with each other like we used to, feel free to share our opinions with one another & not have to be afraid of judging. I love how we can have a casual conversation about masturbation one minute & work the next. It is great.

All day long I had been craving the salad/potato(e) soup combo from Panera so that is where we set out to go once Snookms got home & showered. They didn't even have potato(e) soup that day! FAIL! I guess I should've been more keen to the whole soup o' the day thing, but whatever! I was so dissapointed. But I settled for some cream of chicken thing. & then they even forgot to put the cheese crumbles in our cobb salads so I had to ask for it, it is what gives the salad the kick that makes it worth even buying in the first place. Otherwise it is just a ... bacon salad?

After that we headed to the Sprint shop; Snookms had a fancy Blackberry his brother gave him, he had mentioned getting his service switched from his dinosaur phone to that one, so I was like, Heck ya! Go for it! Since I already broke my Palm. So we get there & he has it turned on in MY name! Whoa? No way, Snookms you spoil me with phones! So that was part of the anniversary present I guess? & it was a present to him too because he didn't have to pay anything for it. & if you are going to find a Snookms Weak Spot, the wallet is where it will be EVERY TIME.

So after that fun was over (I have unlimited texts now...w0000000000t) we headed back out to Metropolis. Drove past the barber shop Snookms goes to & he mentioned needing his hairz did so I told him to go for it. So he did. HE NEVER LETS THEM PUT GEL IN WHEN THEY'RE DONE. Why?

Headed to Rue 21 when he was done there & I bought a Juno-esque looking plaid summer dress on clearance for 15 bucks, some comfy purple work pants for 6 fat ones & a really adorable giant pewter butterfly ring. SQUEEAK. I was totally looking forward to wearing my safety pin laced boots with the dress, & some black fishnets & the butterfly ring along with the new black octopus necklace that Let-Dawg acquired for me @ Hot Topic.

Let's see...when that was done we went to the Starbux haunt that Mysty & I usually hang at & went inside this time. (We are usually outdoors & smoking?) So we sat & chatted about a buttload of stuff, mostly about him tryna get his own insurance so that he can run his own framing crew. He's been doing it for years really, just under someone else's foot. So like, hell yeah I'm gonna be supportive of that shit. Snookms was basically born with a woodchip under his ear. It was really nice to have all that Snookms to myself. Don't get me wrong, it's great to have all the kiddoes, but it's so hard to get a meaningful conversation in edge-wise with spawn interrupting you every 10 seconds.

We had to grab some cereal for the next morning so we stopped by Meijer, the nearest supermarket, to get that & some other snacks for the kiddoes. Found some adorable baby orchids & Snookms bought me one! Eeeeeeeeeeeek! So pretty. I love how they make faces at me.

Came home, put the precious spawnies to bed & elected to watch The Men Who Stare at Goats. I told Snookms he'd prolly love it, cause I had watched 3/4's of it earlier that day, so I was all jazzed about him watching it too. But he didn't like it as much as I did. That's okay though. His mancrush for George Clooney still remains.

Had some great anniversary sex & fell asleep curled up in Snookms' arms for the night.

The next day was pretty fun too, went to see The Runaways with Mysty at the Keystone Art Cinema in Castleton. I had my silent reservations with this film beforehand, just because well, you know how they hype shit up these days & it all goes south from there for me... but oh man. I fucking LOVED this movie. The opening scene shows a fucking blood clot falling from Dakota Fanning's pussy! & it only gets better from there. Seeing Kristin Stewart make out with Dakota Fanning was the icing on the Runaways cake. & Michael Shannon playing as Kim Fowley had me sighing & swooning with his, "You gotta think with your cocks!" attitude. I'd recommend this movie to anyone.

Had fun just smoking & chatting it up with Mysty afterwards. We shared a peanut butter & chocolate chip cookie from Mrs. Field's cookie shop, hadn't had one o' those in YEARS. Verrrry tasty. Then it was home sweet home.

Fast forward to Saturday, spent it @ my mom & dad's hanging out with 2 of my brothers & their spawn... Had fun playing catch up with my mom, she is a marvelous person to have for a mother? She kept threatening to take us up the the carnivale down the street in the old Target parking lot. I told her, "Wait til darkness falls! It'll be funner!" So we did! Even got Snookms & my dad to go (he starred as Keifer Sutherland from The Lost Boys). It was a total blast. I went on that rotational ride that sways yer ass back & forth til you hang all the way upside down, suspended in the motherfucking air & shit. I wasn't able to sit in the same booth as Jr. & Snookms so I had to sit with some 12 year old girl who was really cute but really scared. She had no idea what she was in store for! The whole time she is crying & yelling out, "I want my mooooooommy!" So I had to play coach & get her through the ordeal. I am getting OLDE. & mortal! Those things fuck with me now! I felt sick afterwards!

We let the spawn play some of the rip off games & they won stuff. She-Spawn aimed her shit like a champ & got a tiger in return...

Then it was home... I can't even remember what we did then? Watched something? I'll remember later.

& then yesterday! Mysty took off early from working the Big Kahuna desk @ her current place of employment to watch The Human Centipede with me On Demand. OH SNAP! So disgusting but I was hoping & expecting more? I am a sick little puppy. Sue me. But yeah, I'm already ready for the next "sequence". BFF CENTIPEDE FOR LIFE.

I also forgot to talk about Robbie's Birthday fun from like 2 Saturdays ago, but Katie has it all documented & even put the photos in a Flickr account for all ya'lls viewing pleasure. It was OH SO MUCH FUN. Robbie sent me the most ADORABLE fucking picture of himself yesterday on muh phone, & made my fucking morning with dedicating Darkness's Proposal to meeeeee. SO IN LUFF AM I.

Today it is hopefully going to be all about seeing Iron Man 2, tried to go see it last night after eating a late dinner @ El Rodeo (or 'Gooseo' as Let-Dawg & I have coined it, another funny story to share for next time!) but they were all sold out for the time we wanted to see it. The next showing wasn't till 10 o'clock p.m. & we weren't about to see a 2 hour flick that fucking late. We are olde! I nod off in theatres if it is past my bedtime, no lie!

Tomorrow/tomarrow is Mother's Day. All I asked for was an Itunes card & a banana split from the highly scarcity of awesomeness that is Baskin Robbins. I got online last night to make sure they weren't extinct & sure enough there was 3 in our area. Gotta get my Jamocha fix on! But yeah, that's what I asked for... & today, which isn't even Mother's Day! my spawn showered me in gifts! She-spawn hand painted me a shirk with the Otep logo "Art Saves" on it & Fezziwig GAVE ME his treasured clay project that had been chosen to put on display in the hallways of his school. It is a bowl, in the shape of an amber star, with green trimmings. So beautiful & original! It is my new jewelry catcher.

I'd share pictures with the group but I am still tryna figure out the whole picture thing in regard to uploading stuff online, but when I do, prepared to be spammed with muh shit fools.