It's how I feel in my blackened hour. I wrote this over 3 years ago, and yet something still reaches inside me and crushes my heart everytime I read it. I don't cringe in disgust when I happen across this one yet, so perhaps it's a keeper?
I had written this "piece" with a particular half breed vampire in mind. Battling with the "holiness" of his elven blood coursing through his veins, but alas, still won't to give in to those lustly vampiric ways. I, of course, was living vicariously though my poems those days as well. :)
In deep withstanding I do behold,
the power to succumb as the mystery unfolds
the twilight's darkness,
which summons thy night, and beckons the moon to bring forth it's light.
In it's waxing and waning, I do foretell,
the shadows cast for the 'marrow, and fears do swell.
For in vain do I ponder the realm of it's deep,
in waking and slumber, it's thoughts I do keep.
Ever in the darkness do I search for my soul,
and the light to it's path do I wish to unfold!
In darkness, in chaos, it's perilous form...
is naught in the day, it's beauties do swarm.
I chase the light yet my soul wretches the day,
my blood lusts for the darkness
yet in night do I pray...
I pray for the light, my soul to keep
and never to awaken those souls once reaped