Thursday, October 16, 2008

Fraudulent nonsense

My dad has always (intuitively) been a mechanic of sorts. Not just in the way of engineering, but in all other aspects and mannerisms of the "what makes it work?" mentality.

He would have to sort of work his way into a situation, you know, talk his-self up? Like when he landed the job at Hitco, he had no prior experience with missile heads. But he had the ambition, and intuitiveness to "fake" his way into getting the position. He eventually wound up with other cool ass jobs like that one. Boeing, United Airlines....lead mechanic at that.

I guess I'm just trying to relate my own calculated bullshit equation here to his. I mean, I remember him being able to figure out how to make it all work in his life, from being a father, to being the companion that my mother needed to get her through her "booby hatch" spells, to building a professional deck in his back yard with no prior knowledge as to how to build one in the first fucking place. And he did it. The part that is bittersweet about all this is that he never gave himself enough credit for what he accomplished. He always felt like a "fraud" because he didn't approach the situation like everyone else. He didn't have years of college to show on his "shirt sleeve", or the know-how for all the rules, or even all the right materials for the situation at hand for that matter. But God-damnit, he had intuition and drive. A drive that wouldn't let him stop until he achieved his definition of perfect. And I think that more than anything, the fact that he did all of that WITHOUT the merits of college, the bragging rights of "I know all the rules and you don't", and the financial prosperity to afford all the materials that everyone else needed to make a project work warrants far more than what he's given himself credit for. He did it and didn't need what everyone needed to get him from point A to point B, and managed to come out of it all with a sense of accomplishment. The fucker bent over, showed everyone his ass, and told every orthodoxial mutherfucker out there to "Kiss the Starfish", and didn't even have to say one word.

People like us, with mental differences (fuck disability, that's just neanderthal as all hell) are ALWAYS going to have to face this dilemma, because there is always gonna be that smart ass, that wise guy, that gets all fucking self important and insecure, because someone who was supposed to have the role of the "Tortoise", is now owning your ass as "The Hare".

I'm hurt right now. Really, fucking hurt. And tired. Of society. Of it's ideals. Of everyone out there saying "Hey! You can't do that!"

But guess what assfucks?!?!

We're doing it, aren't we?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your old man rocks. Tell the geezer I said 'hello.'

Anonymous said...

Why thank you "Denny". I'll do that.

So tell me, do YOU have a "blob"?? Hmmmm???