I cooked out for dinner. I love to cook out. It's these same humid summer nights, these same lonely summer nights that I live for every year.
One year, I was going through one of my manic phases of bi-polar. It was like 3 in the morning, and I had just got done moving my furniture around. Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. I had the sliding door open with the screen closed to let some of that midnight summer humidity in, so I could feel summer's midnight wrath full force, when I heard a sort of heavy fluttering sound, sort of like a bird. I thought to myself how unusual for a bird to be out and about this late, so I wondered excitedly if it was a bat. I saw from the shadow of the porch's light that it had to be something pretty substantial, to cause that much of a shadow's forecast. I quickly grabbed a jar and headed to the porch light that this creature seemed to be attracted to, and low and behold, it was a giant freaking moth. It's wingspan stretched further than both my hands put together. You could clearly see it's eyes, mouth, tongue and other such counterparts, and it's body was as fat as my ring finger, and just about as long. It was a beautiful silvery color, with splotches of black here and there. I felt as though I was disrupting the forces of the universe by ensnaring such a beautiful thing. I quickly brought it in the house and took turns waking each of my family members up individually, so I could show them my newfound discovery. I didn't have the heart to let it go without first showing my kids and husband, granted it was 3 in the morning. They were all far too befuddled with sleep to show any real appreciation, but I understood. They were sleepy. The next morning I knew they would be full of questions, and that's all that mattered. I unscrewed the jar I kept this flight of soul in, and let it free into the humid summer night air, wishing it well on it's exotic travels. I will always hold that night dear to my heart, as it was a moment with God that I truly felt He shared with me. A "picture" for our album of life to later share together and reminisce over.
Every time I go out there to cook on our grill, I remember that special moment together and feel blessed to be alive, no matter what the circumstances are around me.